Some winds come at unexpected moments, blinding your vision with disturbing dust. You can hear the destructive sounds but you are in the middle of nowhere. With eyes opened it seems EVERYTHING HAS COLLAPSED!
After my high school graduation in Alexandria City, I was so excited with the idea of going to university. I kept repeating “Yeah, you did it girl”. All of us, my family, friends, and neighbors came together to celebrate this glorious event. We ate cakes and sweets while dancing and taking pictures. Everyone kept asking the same question “Which college would you like to go to?”. Silent, I sewed my mouth shut. I’m known for my decisive personality, but I blushed and quickly replied “Not yet”.
Tears of joy and happiness prevented me from sleeping. I was laying in my bed thinking about what my future might hold. Then, I had a dream. I saw myself dragging a pen to the top of a golden mountain. I was running in a desert while a lion that could speak threw a pen and said “GET THE MOUNTAIN”. I held it on the top of the mountain. The dream ended. Short and adventurous scene for a perfect movie, isn’t it?
I had no clue that this ‘unconscious event’ would put its nails into the ground. I was on the right track to achieve my goal of becoming a journalist. Suddenly, the table turned upside down. All of my family rejected the idea of devoting my skills, abilities, culture, and knowledge for the sake of “a miserable future”. Their point was that journalists who pursue truth and justice are all in jail because Egypt does not comply with international regulations of journalism. It destroys each individual’s rights to work within the country. Their screams are echoed into a darkened forest. The Constitution preserves only liquid words.
Despite my family’s objections I persisted and proceeded with my ambitions. Consequentially, my parents abided my passion, declared it a “windy” action and forced me to go to the second option (Faculty of Languages). What a world!! I became a vivid reflection of an anti-female conflict in Arab society. I felt so pathetic compared to my old self. A girl challenged to win the competition, who jumped over the fire of integrity and is now sacrificing her destiny.
As I remained powerless another difficulty arose! My father’s financial situation did not allow for me to stay in Cairo. “You will have to take the train daily,” he said. I spent the first year of college in frustration, paralyzed with despair. The danger of taking a train at 3 AM is meeting people with sharpened eyes. I can’t describe this fear. Imagine being under the claws of potential harassment or kidnapping. It psychologically distressed me but I complied.
And here I am, within the castle of education Ain Shams University. I quickly rid myself of this eternal pain by making friends, and what’s more! I realized that my degree would qualify me to be a Journalist! It only requires a language and four years to pass and graduate with a good degree. I made a lot of accomplishments at the university. All of my professors encouraged me to take my desired path. One of them even said, ” I know your suffering is tough but I can predict you an outstanding future”.
I am now very confident. All of my sorrows and sadness were transformed into a solid golden hope. I climbed up a mountain facing scolding and mocking, and YES waves tortured me badly, but I am still alive and waiting for tomorrow.